ironies

They upped my credit limit again.

The notice I got in the mail, which wasn't a statement and which I therefore ripped open in a panic, read, "Your outstanding credit management has earned you a credit line increase..."

Ha. Yes. What they mean by that is, "Your ceaseless monthly payments at just over the minimum in a desperate and futile attempt to outstrip our ridiculous interest rate while juggling the rest of your bills on your limited resources because you maxed out your former credit limit on medical emergencies for your cat have gained us enough additional income that we want to entice you to use some more."

How kind.

What kind of outstanding credit management would they be praising me for if I actually used outstanding credit management and could pay off the whole damn thing in one go?

Still, I guess this means my credit isn't horrible. Always a bonus.

Although I'm half-tempted to take the business reply envelope they enclosed with the thing, in case I want to pay for more services, and write, "Dear Sir or Madam: Mightn't you consider the use of 'superb' or 'excellent' in the opening line of your credit line increase notices, rather than 'outstanding,' so as to avoid association in the minds of your customers with the negative use of the adjective when paired with such nouns as 'bill' or 'account' or 'balance'? Or is the ambiguity deliberate, in which case I must congratulate you on your cleverness?"

Once an English major in Narnia...